Lord Nelson

I promised you a post on Nelson… well here we go. Strap yourself in for an epic post!

First off here’s the man himself

Totally cool right?

And now his full name/titles as read at his funeral:: The Most Noble Lord Horatio Nelson, Viscount and Baron Nelson, of the Nile and of Burnham Thorpe in the County of Norfolk, Baron Nelson of the Nile and of Hilborough in the said County, Knight of the Most Honourable Order of the Bath, Vice Admiral of the White Squadron of the Fleet, Commander in Chief of his Majesty's Ships and Vessels in the Mediterranean, Duke of Bronte in Sicily, Knight Grand Cross of the Sicilian Order of St Ferdinand and of Merit, Member of the Ottoman Order of the Crescent, Knight Grand Commander of the Order of St. Joachim.

My first impression of this man came from my tour guide in London on the Saturday bus tour. When we went past his monument she started out by giving a some history then telling us that the English really like him because he kicked a lot of French ass. She really said that. Then she told us about his death and that’s when I knew he was an epic person, but I’ll fill you in on that later.

For some more starters.

Occupation: English Flag Officer for Royal Navy

Most notable battle:: Battle of Trafalgar (1803)

Born:: 29 September 1758

Died:: 21 October 1805

He was such a looker when he was young...

Sorry back to the story, I’ll make this quick so we can get to the best part. He joined the Navy. Kicked a lot of butt. Got married to some ugly lady..

Captured lots of ships. Got injured in the Battle of Santa Cruz de Tenerife and had to get his right arm amputated. Kicked more butt in the Battler of the Nile. Received the title of Baron Nelson of the Nile. Went back home. Got himself hooked up with the Hamilton. Started getting comfy with Emma… she was a cutie..

This didn’t make Fanny happy and she left Nelson. Lots of time passed and yeah I just want to get to my favorite part. So the battle of Trafalgar…

Napoleon was being well…. Napoleon and he wanted to take England but Nelson would have no such shenanigans. So their fleets dueled. There was lots of shooting and gory goodness. Aaaaaaaand Nelson was shot.

He was shot by a marksman on an enemy ship. He told his second in command “Hardy, I do believe they have done it at last… my backbone is shot through.” The bullet had entered his left shoulder, punctured his lung and came to rest in his spine. He was taken below decks and made comfortable as he died.

Since Nelson was a super important person they wanted to take Nelson back to England in one piece so that everyone could say their farewell. So since they didn’t have any embalming fluids aboard the ship they put in a coffin full of wine! EPIC!!!!! They pickled him to keep him together for the ride home!! And it worked! His funeral…

And he was buried at St. Paul’s cathedral. Which we visited on the tour and we had time to walk around. Our guide told us that his coffin was visible in the crypts without having to go in. I just had to see it… and I did. Epic. So there you have it. Lord Nelson kicked a lot of French ass and was brought back to England in a coffin full of wine. Classy.

Cheers,