Growing Up

Salut,



So today is my last day of winter break at home. I move in tomorrow and classes start on Tuesday and I’m crossing my fingers that I have enough money for my 18 textbooks this semester plus lab gear for bio. If not…then I’ll make friends with someone who wants to share! Haha any how this is going to be a HUGE rant that I just feel like posting.

So I’m sitting in front of my compy (obviously) and I’m thinking. Now I just finished the second part of The Snowy Waste so I’m ecstatic mostly because the third and final part is so insanely short! And I cannot think of stuff to write currently… so I’m thinking about the whole going back to college and growing up deal. Normally I don’t think about this but I’m babysitting tonight for two little boys I’ve babysat since the older one was a few months old and he’s nearly four! So I feel a wee bit old watching them grow up. But mainly I was thinking about how the older one likes to play with my cell phone and when I first started babysitting I had that dorky old phone and I always hated it. It was mostly because all the “grow ups” had cool phones like the blackberry and other such nifty phones. Now mind you I was a sophomore in high school. And I couldn’t wait to “grow up” because I equated to being older to having a cooler phone.

Middle of junior year I got the Alias that flipped the two ways. Ya that was cool till everyone else got it and I felt like a kid again. Then as I started to get ready for college and what not I got the LG Dare and then I got to thinking that I have a cool phone now and I’m in college so that makes me almost grown up right? This is totally weird to me because I still feel like the same old me. Yet every one must seem someone different cause I went to visit the Aftercare I worked at last year and all the kids wanted to know about college and then they had to tell me how grown up it was that I was going to college and I was floored that they now saw me as a grown up simply because I was in college.

Because last year they knew I was in high school so I guess I was still a kid to them and now… well I must say it doesn’t feel much different. Well actually I lie a wee bit. I still talk to kids who are in high school and it seems sort of awkward to be a college student chilling out with high school kids. Sort of a creepy weird but not really it’s hard to explain. But here I am striving to become a well known author which is something “grow ups” do and I’m still in college! Man it’s just a jumble of me feeling like a kid yet being lumped into that “grow up” group. And then that also raises the once you get out of college what are you going to do… talk about rushing things. People are asking me this and I’m like I’m still a freshman and I have the ambitions I had as a senior which might not all work out in reality so come talk to me when I graduate. So I’ve decided that you’re only a “grown up” when you stop enjoying you job and other things you do. Why you ask? Because all the “grown ups” (excluding my parents) I knew when I was younger hated their jobs and lived for the weekend so I saw them as “grown up” because they did things they didn’t like and kids always get away with only doing the things they like. So that’s why if still feel like a kid because I was always that one kid in the class who LOVED school. And now in college I choose my classes and the time I take the class so it’s fun and I want to go to class. The same goes for, as I call it, my job. A.K.A. my writing. I love doing it and I doubt I’ll ever get tired of it. I’m more than happy with where I am in life and where I am going so I’m along for the ride at this point. One more point! As I was just getting ready to post this Weightless by All Time Low started playing on my compy and the line “If I could just find the time, Then I would never let another day go by, I'm over, getting old” I tots def agree!

Laters,

T.V.